something new
13 years ago
I've figured it all out. It's not my computer; it's me. I am completely technologically handicapped. I just have to go near a computer and its starts working up and doing all these weird things stopping just short of blowing up! (a couple of sparks the last few times don't count do they?!!). If my computer had a mind of its own it'd start blinking "DANGER! HAZARDOUS MATERIAL APPROACHING" signs whenever I'd get into a 10 foot radius.
This time even the computer repair guys couldn't figure out what the problem was and my 7th phone call was met with a very patronising, "Aap mujhe batain aap ne iss computer ke saath kiya kya hai?" (translated into simple patronising English: "Lady, what the hell did you do to this computer??; on second thoughts drop the "Lady"). My handicap has even prompted Umar to write a special computer manual for my sake, always considering i can understand the technological jargon inside it (I think illustrations would help a bit).
I'm seriously scared of the future, you know the ultra technologic age where the computers will have a mind of their own and will be ruling us; you'd find poor old me behind bars all the time (infact i think they wouldn't be stupid enough to let me out after the first couple of times and line me up for a fast execution) for causing mental and physical damage to a thinking metal box. Maybe I should volunteer myself to whichever people are trying to develop this technology to test it. AHA! Thats a brilliant plan 'coz if I am going to be the tester than these computers are never even gonna be seeing the sweet light of day, let alone "think" of ruling us in future. And I'd be able to change the future by blowing up these computers in their developing phase so in the end the poor scientists are sick of even trying.
I'm soo brilliant and in soo much trouble if my computer understands this...
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weird, the last time my pc got virus was when you came over :p and its been infected since then..yikes!!! someone call 15 lol
Anonymous said...
July 11, 2008 at 12:11 PM
Lol...Thats not a problem. Lets try to remove your handicap (One impossible thing to do) cuz you are mentally scared thats all!
Im writing for the greater good!
Um3r said...
July 11, 2008 at 1:54 PM
No she's not scared she's dumb :P... I guess i'm mean baby...Acha hai na computer walay ki rozi lagi hui hai.har maheenay uska cigaretton ka kharcha nikal ata hoga...bas i feel bad for your dad..ooh thats almost a rhyme
m.h.a said...
July 12, 2008 at 7:08 AM
@mubi
tht was zd not me and u know it...
mores the pity :D
@deceptivechaos
lol love the first lines of "for the greater good" manual...havent gotten round to reading the rest and btw tell ur cuzon its his moral duty to comment on my blog after comparing me to his namesake :D
@mha
ur dead buddy!!
Summer Cutee said...
July 12, 2008 at 10:03 AM
Excuse me!! The first few lines carry immense significance..Ure supposed to understand them..not ridicule them..
Let the words sink into your empty head or ankles i should say!
Um3r said...
July 12, 2008 at 11:05 AM
yea..."aisa tou nahin hota na" lol :D
Summer Cutee said...
July 12, 2008 at 11:07 AM
Lol....You have to understand what not to do before you learn how to do it ;)
Um3r said...
July 12, 2008 at 11:11 AM
u mean kicking is out?? :(
Summer Cutee said...
July 12, 2008 at 2:10 PM
Read it first
Um3r said...
July 13, 2008 at 1:31 AM
seriously speaking whats wrong with your PC hmm?
any virus related issue or its something to do with the hardware?
Anonymous said...
July 20, 2008 at 12:38 PM